LAFOLOT

Did you ever hear the warning about using a dead bolt to lock your house, because a basic lock can be broken into using a credit card?
Well, from experience (eh hem), I can tell you it’s true!

Just having bought a modular home that still needed to be inspected; I was given a master key for the ‘basic’ door handle lock so I could move some small items into the home.

Being used to dead bolt locks, I accidentally turned the inside lock on the handle, shut the door behind me and locked my car and house keys in the new home! Problem is, it was 6:30am on on a Friday. I ‘did’ have an extra set of car keys with me, thank goodness!

The BIG PROBLEM WAS – I am a menopausal woman over 50 who takes a blood pressure pill with a water pill in it – enough said? If no, let me tell you, a bathroom trip is required every 5 minutes, when it is first taken!

In my defense, I was exhausted from moving. I had slept on the floor the night before, so I could be ready for the movers with my bed disassembled. I THOUGHT I was thinking clearing and had made every effort to make sure I had everything before I left the modular home. I wanted to go over to my old condo to do some final cleaning early in the morning. I was really PISSED OFF – I guess I should use a different word – HA HA – because I was now stuck.

It was 6:30am and I didn’t want to wake anyone.
It was the day after a heavy rain, so there was a steady DRIP DRIP coming down from the roof rain gutter onto my head as I tried to work on the door.
I had heard you could use a credit card to open a basic door know lock.

I didn’t use my credit card, but I had some club cards I wasn’t using that were expendable.
Everytime I tried to insert the plastic card, I would get HIT with a wet SPLAT on my head.
After 5 minutes of no luck, I was soaked on one side of the head! HA HA

I had MANAGED to get the door to BUDGE a bit, but I realized later, I was just too timid.
I had to RUSH to my car and drive to the nearest McDONALDS to use their bathroom. It was a TRUE EMERGENCY!
I then sat in one of the booths in the back to gather my thoughts.
I tried calling a younger sister to see if she had a spare key to my old condo, so I could meet her at work and pick it up – but no, she didn’t.
While I was waiting, one man was having a breakfast meeting with another man and giving him spiritual advice on job loss, his marital relationship, etc. I figured, what the heck, I just listened.

I got the thought to MAKE ANOTHER EFFORT at the door. He was being given the advice ‘Faith without works, is dead.’ At least that’s what I heard.

I went back to THE SCENE OF THE CRIME and met a couple neighbors who gave me contact numbers for other possible people with the master key. I couldn’t get ahold of anyone.

I went back to my new home door –
I got out my OLLIE – GOOD STUFF CHEAP CLUB CARD and tried again.

I guess I was NOW CONFIDENT and DETERMINED!

When I finally got it slipped into the door and felt the door budge – I THREW THE FULL WEIGHT OF MY OVERWEIGHT, MENOPAUSAL, WATER PILL – GOTTA GOOOOOOOO Body into the door and it opened!

*PFEW! I flew to the bathroom! (first things first!) Then I was able to go about my day.

So, I am here to testify:

YES, I broke into my own home, using a plastic bonus club card.

Here’s the lesson – NEVER MESS WITH A MENOPAUSAL WOMAN ON A BLOOD PRESSURE WITH WATER PILL COMBINATION!

Also – always lock your deadbolt and don’t rely on the door handle lock.

Ha Ha Helen Szollosy of LAFOLOT
Living Life! and Laughing Often!
Thank God I’m smart enough NOT to take this as a lesson to pursue a life of crime!
Amen.

I was blessed to have the opportunity to give a LAFOLOT Laughter Wellness demo at our local ‘The Healthy Grocer’ store this past Tuesday. They open their lunchroom to ‘alternative healers/wellness’ folks to demonstrate their gifts.

I entered wearing my ‘now unofficially trademarked’ Tinsel Deely Bobber Headband. A store clerk approached me as I went up to talk to my contact and asked: ‘Are YOU the laughter wellness person?’ I said: ‘What makes you say that?’ Greg, ‘The Healthy Grocer’ wellness program coordinator said: ‘She asked how she’d know you. I told her, don’t worry, you won’t miss her!’ HA HA – Good thing I remembered to wear the tinsel deely bobber headband into the store!

I encountered a blonde hair, blue eyed, wide-eyed with a BIG SMILE little toddler as I was waiting for folks to arrive. Kids tend to think I’m a clown just because of my head gear! I had one of my LAFOLOT Stress Reliever Pinwheels with me, and I was making it twirl around. The little girl was EYEing it. When she and her mom and grandmom went to check out – I held the pinwheel out towards her. (I had already given her a smiley face bookmark.) It was hilarious – we started a TODDLER vs. SILLY ADULT PERSON – dance. She took two steps forward, two steps back! So I did the same. She giggled. I started a sideways crab walk movement, continuing to hold out the pinwheel towards her – then I’d step back. She mimicked me. She giggled. So we shimmied forward and back, sideways and back till I finally stretched long and forward so she would take the pinwheel. She accepted it with a big smile! Her ‘mommy’ told her to say thank you! It was the funniest thing! I love playing with kids and their shyness…OR WAS SHE PLAYING WITH ME AND MY ADULTNESS?

I had two wonderful attendees at my program. One was named IDA and she was professionally trained as a clown known as CHARITY! We had healthy fun and they took smiley bookmarks to pass around, LAFOLOT pamphlets, LAFOLOT canvas shopping bags, as well as wanted to bring me to their church to do a program or a Full Belly Laughter Club! It was a success!

When I left, I stopped at our local ARBYs. I ordered a small drink and decided to order the cheese sticks. When I got to the window to pay, the guy asked: ‘Did you get your drink yet?’ Well no – so I answered. (this made no sense but I just went with the flow) I had agreed to donate a Dollar to Big Brothers Big Sisters so I was gathering my quarters together. A girl came to the window and asked if I was a motivational speaker? She had seen my LAFOLOT Magnetic advertising panel on the side of my card. I said YES! and gave her a few SMILEY FACE bookmarks (I don’t use business cards). I let her know it would be fun to bring me in for an emloyee meeting, etc. She was excited. Then, the young guy who had asked about the drink gave me my ‘BAG’ with my order. As I pulled forward I reached into the bag and it didn’t feel like cheese sticks. I had been given a roast beef sandwich! HA HA HA – I just continued on home! There was too big a line of cars at the drive thru to go back and I was tired!

I had to drive through the GIANT Food Store parking lot to get to an exit with a traffic light, for ease of getting across the roadway in the opposite direction. I had paid for Shopping Cart advertising at this store for two seasons, but had to stop due to lack of funds. As I stopped at one of the ‘customer crosswalk’ indicators, a mom and her little girl were pushing their cart across the road into the store. The little girl turned and smiled at me. I got a laugh and smile! I saw the cart she was pushing had my LAFOLOT Laughter Wellness big AD on it! I guess they didn’t have an AD to replace it and let mine on the cart from the last season! WHAT A GIFT!

So! Between the little girl toddler who PLAYED with me to get her pinwheel and the little girl showing me that I was getting FREE Advertising – they BOOK-ENDED a perfect evening of healthy laughter, fun and play!

SOMEONE OUT THERE IS LOOKING OUT FOR ME – THANKS! ;O)

Ha Ha Helen Szollosy of LAFOLOT
Living Life in Amazement!
Live Life! Laugh Often!
…and don’t be afraid to do the crab sidestep with a toddler once in awhile
[this blog can also be seen on Vibrant Nation under blog name: Helenoflafolot]