Posts Tagged ‘child abuse’
Monday, August 13th, 2012
I always found it an interesting observation about the nature of addict behavior. We might judge an addict as not caring about their life; when, if you look closely, there’s a perfectionism about the mis-management of the life.
Coming from a family of addicts, I got to personally view a lot of interesting behavior, as well as my own through continuing to become aware, feel, and heal.
For example, I have 3 sets of neighbors who are meticulous in maintaining their homes! These are ‘good’ people! Hard working! Good parents and grandparents. I ‘see the love’ and ‘healthy interaction’ when the children and grandkids come to visit. Then there is, in all 3 households, the addiction of tobacco smoke use.
With all this meticulous detail to the External Physical Environment, to the kids, grandkids, to the dedication to the employment, there’s the Lack of Awareness and Concern for the INTERNAL PHYSICAL self.
I learned, through 12 step programs, to separate the different aspects of a person with addictions. It’s how I came to appreciate the ‘other qualities’ of my own mom, separate from her abuse of alcohol.
It saddened me to observe the one family openly smoking in front of their grandchildren the other day. One particular moment involved the 2 year old REACHING UPWARD for ‘Grandma’s’ cigarette – as if it were candy or a toy! Why couldn’t she have it? She wondered. The grandma not being aware of what was being taught to the toddler. The grandma not being AWARE of the gaseous-smoke being wafted around the child’s play area.
Yesterday, I observed one of the other couples, sitting on their front porch, loving and enjoying the company of the newest grandchild, less than a year old, sitting on the grandma’s lap. Both grandparents smoke and were actively smoking with the baby there.
Again, meticulous house, would protect that baby’s physical self in a heartbeat. Would jump in front of a moving train, yet the ADDICTION blinding the harm it is inflicting on the baby. I’ve seen the same with the addiction to white flower/sugar/grease/fat. A mother actively ingesting 2 cookies while sitting at a local sandwhich shop; handfeeding them to the toddler, and then purchasing a dozen more to take with them. Having an issue with that myself, I had a strong feeling those cookies wouldn’t make it home.
Another instance, I observed a mother allowing a child to actively just eat the butter out of the butter packets, one after the other, at a local restaurant. Addictions come in all shapes and sizes at an early age. Addiction or the body starving for proper nutrition? I couldn’t say.
The Department of Health put up Billboards, years back, showing how ODD, SICKLY etc. persons look, who smoke tobacco. They were trying to bring awareness.
I have a new thought or suggestion to the Department of Health. Perhaps if they put up billboards – graphically showing the harmful smoke being wafted across the faces of the Babies, Children, Pets, Wildlife (graphically – not a true photo) – it would AWAKE the addicts?
But then again, WHAT AM I SAYING? The only person that can change the habits of an addict, are the addicts themselves.
BEing, sitting, and observing – LIFE in action … or DESTRUCTION?
i n t e r e s t i n g …
I’m not a parent, I don’t have children, I can only observe and ponder, not judge, as I wonder. I see the external, physical love of ENVIRONMENT and the CARING of the INTERNAL SELF for self and other ‘loved’ ones going UP – IN – SMOKE.
Wednesday, February 8th, 2012
I had the ‘inspiration’ to create a video about bullying, for my www.youtube.com/helenoflafolot channel, the past couple days. I had been stalling. I want to focus the video on my personal experience with bullying; what happened in the life of one of my bullies (which allowed me to see her differently); and direct it to those being bullied.
Well, I just came from an unsettling grocery shopping experience.
I was walking towards the back of the store’s frozen foods section. Walking towards me was an adult male (Dad? Father?) PURPOSELY KICKING the backs of the shoes of ?? his 8 year old – possibly – daughter. He kept looking down to MAKE SURE HE PURPOSELY KEPT KICKING the backs of her shoes.
They were about 8 feet away from me, walking towards me. I tend to talk, joke, interract with people when I am out; but I was at a loss for words!
I watched the young girl’s face. It was neutral, no response. Was she feeling embarrassed, or used to being treated like this? She wasn’t smiling, wasn’t laughing. She was just dutifully walking in front of this man (father? dad?) PURPOSELY making it difficult for her to walk!
I think I just stopped, looked, and my face must have had a puzzled, WHAT THE HECK IS THIS MAN DOING look on it.
He THEN STOPPED, and said as they passed: ‘YOU DIDN’T SEE THAT’.
I ‘WANTED’ to say: WHO, is the ADULT in this instance!?
We wonder WHERE children learn BULLYING?
We wonder WHY children, and ADULTS get involved in bullying.
Bullying is no laughing matter. What has this man taught this young girl?
Helen Szollosy of LAFOLOT.COM
…at a loss for words, in a way. Perhaps I was being PROMPTED to MAKE THE VIDEO I had been stalling to make… MESSAGE RECEIVED!